From Leia's Beautiful Mind

From Urban dictionary: ride or die when you are willing to do anything for someone you love or someone you really appreciate in your life. the person who you  stand by  in any problem and  vice versa . the term "ride till the end  or die trying " I've reached a point in my life where I question myself what is it that makes me not settle down.  If I truly have no desire to be in a relationship or start a family.  Why I rocked the boat to a seemingly peaceful and stable past relationship with a good person from a good family and who has the same faith as I do. It was supposed to be a perfect match and a relationship with a clear direction.  Yet there I was nursing my traumas in life and thinking about my what ifs.  I still have goals and ambition and wasn't very sure I was ready to start a "peaceful" life and forget about my calling.  Fear and anxiety got to me that I would be marrying without me having reached my goals for myself and for my family.  I have ma

Knowing you L, you must be sitting in front of your computer after a long day's work and listening to an Anson Seabra song or Harlem River by Kevin Morby.  So, how are you L?  Knowing you L, you'll probably look down and smile shyly which others would see as sweet.  But nobody really catches the quick second before you force a smile that you were actually hiding the tear that was about to fall had you not bowed your head. Of course, you will say "I'm okay." and shift the conversation and ask how others are doing just to get the attention away from you.  Of course L. Of course.  You packaged yourself very well over the years L. Like a fortress. The one who takes care of things and others. The go-to girl, the reliable one, the one people run to for practical advice.  The strong one, the one who just works and works and works.  Yet no one knows L, that you go home empty. Tears that you disallow to fall just welling inside your eyes.  You put your bags down and greet

I started this blog back in 2012.  My last post was still last 2016.  Now four years after and I am back!  So what took me so long?  Life happened.  I cannot put into detail everything that has transpired since then.  I shall only share one of the most significant event that happened in my life after all these years. I GOT SAVED. By what? Did I go through a life and death situation? An accident?  Actually I died.  Yes you read that right.  Rather, the old me has died. I decided to retain all my previous posts here when I was still so young and foolish and thought I knew it all.  Reading them again made me cringe. What was I thinking back then? Well I'm leaving them here for you readers to peruse. It's still a blessing to see and compare how far I have grown and changed over the years. I didn't realize I had been so blind and my eyes were covered by scales that I could not see the light.  I thought I was living my life to the fullest, enjoying my time and labor her

Listen.  Listening is harder to do than speaking in my opinion.  Most of us wants to speak, to be heard.  Yet, how many among us really know how to listen and not just hear? These past months I have gained a little bit of weight and I was stressing myself out trying to lose the pounds.  See, I was only 105 lbs and I suddenly ballooned to 125 lbs.  Honestly, I can shed those off in two weeks had I returned to my GM diet.  That was the quickest way to lose the excess weight.  However, my second try with the GM diet left me sick because my immune system wasn't that good and I was always swamped with work.  Then my mother said she attended a Herbalife meeting since she also wanted to lose weight. The moment I heard "Herbalife" I was very skeptical because I had a previous bad experience with an MLM company I tried to join before.  I told her that they are just going to force her to recruit members and only 1% of the uplines earn and 99% fail.  She told me she was not told

Say what?! General Motors?  Isn't that an automobile company?  What has the car giant know about dieting? Okay, let me give you a background why I started this diet plan.  I am someone who hates the gym.  It bores me out of my mind.  I love dancing, I love yoga, but I equate the gym to a painful struggle.  Besides, I'm just not really comfortable working out with a lot of people and ummm... men. As to why I started.  It is because I have gained weight.  I mean who wouldn't if you own a place that serves food?  Availability and access.  I used to be only 105 pounds and I panicked when I checked that I am already 115 pounds (here piggy piggy piggy...) .  Some people think they are giving me a compliment when they mentioned I gained weight and they think I got prettier but deep inside me I feel so insecure and I am not comfortable. I am used to my 105 pounds and I want to go back to that. General Motors Diet or GM Diet was started by the General Motors Corp to keep their

Tonight I invited my long-time friends to a belated birthday dinner.  We ate at FOGO, a mexican restaurant near to our own restaurant.  I like simple gatherings and meet-ups like this.  We don't really see each other often and don't talk everyday but it is comforting to know that we have maintained our ties with each other for many years now since our student days. I like long-term friendships.  We meet a lot of new people along the way but it is with long time friends that we feel at home the most because of shared experiences.  I realized how I miss conversing with people my own age and level of maturity.  We continuously learn from each other through an exchange of new learnings and experiences from our adult life. at Fogo (which means Fire) Eds, Mardyl and I were college classmates.  We were also groupmates in our Senior Project Video Documentary output which WE WON by the way ;) We really are unexpected friends.  I thought our friendship would end after w